Deep thoughts….

[Wasted wages]

I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so
I sat down and had a cold beer.
The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking.

My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing,
and I said, "Nothing."
The reason I said "nothing" instead of saying "just thinking" is because she then would have asked, "About what?"
At that point I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics, which would lead to other questions.

Finally I pondered an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?

Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts, but how could they know?

Well, after another beer, and some more heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with an answer to that question.

Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn't really know, here is the reason for my conclusion:

A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."
But you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

I rest my case.

Time for another beer. Then maybe a nap.

 

[Gary Parker]

Frank - I have to agree wholeheartedly that mowing the law is a great time to think.
I also agree that any hit in the nuts causes such great pain that is to be avoided at all costs - so much so that in the game of cricket the batsmen wore protectors over their nuts (we call the device a box - same as a cup for you) for a very long time before they ever thought to start wearing batting helmets to protect their heads. Priorities !
Women cricket players also wear a groin protector that some (crude) men have given the same name as the heavy, round, metal cover that gives access to underground services sometimes in roadways.
Go and mow the lawn and have a laugh when you work it out !

 

[Anthony Asaro]

I gave up mowing the grass years ago. It took me half a day and I was beat when I was done. The landscaper comes every Monday and finished in 20 minutes and I have the beer watching them and don't even work up a sweat.

 

[Wasted wages]

Frank - I have to agree wholeheartedly that mowing the law is a great time to think.
I also agree that any hit in the nuts causes such great pain that is to be avoided at all costs - so much so that in the game of cricket the batsmen wore protectors over their nuts (we call the device a box - same as a cup for you) for a very long time before they ever thought to start wearing batting helmets to protect their heads. Priorities !
Women cricket players also wear a groin protector that some (crude) men have given the same name as the heavy, round, metal cover that gives access to underground services sometimes in roadways.
Go and mow the lawn and have a laugh when you work it out !

One of my friends got in serious trouble for writing that exact phrase on a box of panty liners in the stockroom… management was not amused…

 

[Andy Nightingale]

Getting kicked in the nuts is absolutely nothing compared to having them detached with a laser and the anaesthetic wearing off several times during the process, I can assure you that…

 

[Ray Sametz]

After a few beers, cats don't help also.

 

[Timbo Whalen]

I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so
I sat down and had a cold beer.
The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking.

My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing,
and I said, "Nothing."
The reason I said "nothing" instead of saying "just thinking" is because she then would have asked, "About what?"
At that point I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics, which would lead to other questions.

Finally I pondered an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?

Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts, but how could they know?

Well, after another beer, and some more heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with an answer to that question.

Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn't really know, here is the reason for my conclusion:

A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."
But you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

I rest my case.

Time for another beer. Then maybe a nap.

Dude, seriously, you need professional help.......or, simply need to head off to the pond and burn some nitro.

 

[Mike Cathey]

Deep thoughts from Chuck Norris when he said that he at one time had a gender identity crisis, and it was because he too felt like he was a man trapped in a woman's body, then he was born.

 

[Gary Parker]

More deep thoughts -